Ugly Stars
by AnnaMNR
Summary: GaaraxNeji. AU set in present Japan. Drug and alcohol use. Neji passed out on Naruto's shift; what's a gas station attendent to do? Enter: Gaara.
1. Chapter 1

***Okay, here goes: I don't own Naruto, and I didn't make up the lyrics to the first quote in the fic--that belongs to Alkaline Trio. Note please that this is _not_ a song-fic. Anyway, pairing is GaaraxNeji, NejixGaara. I hate the terms 'seme' and 'uke', I don't use them, they don't apply to my fics, and whatever way I write the pairing does not mean that the name that comes first is 'on top.' This is AU and involves drug use, alcohol use, and...possible other dark themes; you'll be warned ahead of time if anything dark is going to occur. Tell me if I get off-track with the characters, I like to stay in-character, so if I'm out, I want to know. =) Please enjoy!***

"It's quite possible, I feel truly dead inside," Gaara mumbled the lyrics under his breath before taking another swig off his bottle. He liked to come out to the bridge and watch the stars some nights, it never brought him peace, or happiness, or anything like that; all it happened to be to him was something to look at when he couldn't sleep. For a few months now he had been using alcohol to alleviate his pain, to take away his thoughts, and to simply leave him in a state of 'not-really-happy but okay.' He found that state much better to be in compared to his usual, morose state of being. The alcohol seemed to numb his heart once he drank enough, and even lessened his homicidal and suicidal ideations, leaving him more personable than usual.

He always got the alcohol from his not-friend Naruto (he didn't consider himself to have any friends, but Naruto wasn't an enemy, so he wasn't sure what to call him) that worked at a gas station and let him buy the liquor underage. Recently this had become an almost nightly occurrence. The older boy had been trying to get him into a better mood since he met him. Sometimes when he was really _really _drunk he would stumble back to the gas station and keep Naruto company through the night, as Naruto was a third shift worker. They talked about meaningless things to begin with, but Naruto had the unnerving habit of being able to get him to open up and discuss some of his problems with him (this being the reason that he had to be so drunk when he returned to the dingy little gas station) ; in return Naruto shared some of his own difficulties.

Gathering himself up, Gaara tripped over his own feet as he rose from the bridge, almost making him fall to the ground, but he caught himself at the last minute. A slight chuckle escaped his lips as he noticed the peculiar position he seemed to be frozen in after he had stopped himself from falling; things always seemed better when you were smashed out of your mind.

Seeing his goal in sight, Gaara allowed a small smile to grace his face as he stumbled back through door he had left from a few hours earlier. Looking up he expected to see Naruto cleaning, attending customers, or reading the magazines of the shelves--all usual activities for the blonde on work nights; tonight appeared to be different though, there was a man that Naruto was attending to, but not a customer. Gaara cocked his head as he watched Naruto pet the other man's hair while he laid with his head down on one of the two tables the gas station had to offer.

"Heeey, Naruto," He had made himself known to the other, as Naruto seemed too busy fussing over the man with long dark hair to notice his entrance. Gaara hadn't noticed that his words were slurred, he never did when he was this drunk.

Snapping his head to the door, Naruto smiled warmly.

"Yo, Gaara, what's up?" He asked as though he weren't petting what appeared to be an unconscious man when he should have been working; in other words, as though this were a normal situation.

"Who--who's that? Is he dead?" Gaara smiled slightly at the word 'dead', not caring that his question didn't make a lot of sense. A sober Gaara would have realized that if a man had died on Naruto's shift he probably would have been a lot more upset, and certainly wouldn't have been touching the dead body.

A laugh escaped the blonde's lips as his eyes returned to the man on his table.

"This is my friend, Neji. He's…having a little trouble right now." Naruto's eyes held sadness as he ruffled through Neji's hair again, a soft moan escaping the black-haired man's lips.

"Wha-s wrong with 'im?" Gaara asked, walking to the table that he had so often slouched over when talking to Naruto on other nights. Pulling out a chair he quickly threw himself down in the seat, not trusting himself to be able to stand for too much longer. He could stand again, he knew, he just couldn't stand in one place for too long of a time when he was drunk, otherwise he would fall.

"Well…" Naruto chewed on his lip as he appeared to be contemplating whether to tell Gaara the truth of what had happened or not. Gaara hadn't noticed the pause between Naruto's words, however.

"He's kind of…overdosed on sleeping pills tonight. He told me how many he took, and said not to call the hospital. This kind of thing has happened before though, so I know he'll be okay." Naruto's eyes wavered, as if he weren't sure he believed his own words. Gently he pushed the hair out of Neji's face and tucked it behind his ear.

Gaara looked at the other man's face after Naruto removed the cover of hair, he was currently drooling a little bit on the table and had a soft, peaceful expression painted on his unconscious face.

"Say, Gaara, think you could do me a favor tonight?" Naruto looked back up at him, smiling a small, fake smile.

Narrowing his eyes, Gaara couldn't help but feel suspicious at what the other man wanted. Were he sober he most likely would have figured it out by now; that was the only downside he could see to the drinking, it made him feel dumb for things he had done while he was drunk when he woke up, and Gaara hated feeling dumb.

"Wha-s that?" Gaara tilted his head, waiting for an answer.

"Well, think you could take Neji to-uh-wherever you stay? I don't know how long he'll be out, and I can't let my boss catch me with him here. If I could take him home with me I would, but I have to work for another six hours…" Naruto's voice became more and more quiet as his small speech went on, as though he felt bad for asking.

"I mean, I have to actually _do _work too, and somebody needs to be watching him to make sure he's okay." He seemed to have found more words after trailing off from the last sentence, because Naruto kept going.

Gaara sent him a skeptical expression, leaning back against the wall so that he wouldn't have to hold himself up straight any longer.

"I do-know…Doesn't he have other friends or family that could take him or something?" The red-head asked, hoping that this would be the end of it. He certainly didn't want to take care of someone he hadn't even officially met yet--he didn't care about, well, anybody enough to do that for them.

Naruto shook his head sadly, bright blue eyes never leaving Neji's face.

"He…well, he _can't_ go back to his family like this, and I don't think he'd want anybody else to see him this way. Nobody that knows him, at least,"

Gaara took one last look at the brunette before rolling his eyes, and nodding his head once to show Naruto that he would do it. He felt that he owed Naruto a little bit, for listening to his problems, confiding in Gaara himself, and selling to him underage--not that he would ever let Naruto know he felt that way.

"I'll call a cab for you two then--say, where do you live? I'll pay for everything, don't worry!" Naruto quickly got up from his seat and ran behind the counter to call from the phone attached to the wall.

Gaara took another sip from his bottle, wondering what exactly he had gotten himself into.


	2. Chapter 2

After having decided where he should take Neji for the night--home with Temari and Kankuro wasn't an option when he was drunk--Gaara decided to have the cabby drop the two of them off at a local park. The backdrop of the park was filled with the dense growth of trees and playground equipment. Dragging Neji out of the cab, Gaara pulled him halfheartedly toward a bench that Gaara wasn't a stranger too. Occasionally he would go to the park to drink as he enjoyed swinging, especially so when drunk, but usually he was sober when he would go there.

"Guess it's jus' us," Gaara frowned as he propped the other man up against the bench, grumbling as his form wouldn't hold itself of and toppled over on top of him. Were he sober he could have figured out a way to keep Neji up without using his own body for Neji's stability. Sighing, Gaara simply let Neji's head lay on his shoulder, trying to imagine that no one was touching him. Squeezing his eyes shut, he tried to forget all of the reasons behind his distaste for the sense of touch.

The red-head's eyes opened quickly when he heard a sound; the Hyuuga man had made another noise in his drug-induced sleep.

"_He almost crawled in here and told me that he took pills again. I was pissed." Naruto rambled with a scowl on his face as the two conscious people in the gas station waited for the cab to get there._

"_He always does the same thing when he," Naruto paused, face darkening to a level Gaara hadn't seen before, "When he tries to kill himself. He takes pills one at a time, and after a certain amount of time he comes to his senses and comes and finds me." Naruto was fuming, something that Gaara didn't know Naruto was capable of doing._

"_It's happened three times now."_

Remembering the conversation he had with Naruto before the cab had picked the two of them up, Gaara wondered if his siblings would tell him he was weird for not wondering why Neji wanted to die. Gaara found it more strange that anyone wanted to _live_.

Glancing down to Neji, Gaara's lips pursed as he thought about what he would tell the other man the next day. _How does one take care of the suicidal? _Gaara's thoughts buzzed through his mind in a hazy manner, drifting in and out of coherency from the alcohol.

_Naruto returned to his seat after hanging up the phone, stating that the cab would be there within fifteen minutes. Gaara honestly couldn't care less about the timeframe; time doesn't mean much when you're drunk, after all. _

"_I remember when we first met. He was so cold, still is on the outside, but he warmed up to me. He's had a lot of pain in his life, Gaara." The blonde spoke the words sadly, reaching out to pet Neji's hair again, fingering through the thin locks as he continued speaking:_

"_He's one of my best friends, so don't let anything happen to him, 'kay?" The words came with that same look of determination that Naruto always seemed to have glued to his face. It wasn't so much as a question as it was a statement, and Gaara found that he couldn't refuse. Glancing down at the weak looking man whose head had made friends with the table, Gaara silently made a vow that nothing would happen to him, even if it was only for Naruto's peace of mind._

_Coming out of his thoughts, Gaara watched how tenderly Naruto touched the other man, and he couldn't help but wonder if the brunette and Naruto were more than just good friends. Shifting his eyebrows together, Gaara tried to think back on what little he knew about friend relationship and lover relationships. From what he knew friends didn't touch each other so intimately, but he couldn't be sure, seeing as how he had nothing to compare Naruto's bond with Neji to._

***

White eyes opened slowly with the rising of the sun. Neji moved his face in his half-awake state to hide his eyes in Naruto's neck. He didn't catch the burst of red that Naruto's hair didn't hold, nor did he notice that the scent he was currently smelling wasn't Naruto's; he was only part awake, after all. He moaned slightly as he woke up a little bit more, yawning in what he believed was Naruto's neck.

"You lived, that should make Naruto happy," A voice that was definitely _not_ Naruto's spoke. Neji's eyes went wide and he threw himself backward, causing himself to fall ungracefully off of the bench. Looking up from his place on the ground, he took in the sight before him: a red-head with the word 'love' in kanji on his forehead; Neji didn't bother with anything beyond his face and head, it was more than enough to recognize that it wasn't Naruto he had nuzzled into just minutes earlier.

"Who are you? Where's Naruto?" Neji demanded, eyes narrowing. Neji realized that he probably didn't look very threatening, as he was still clothed in the pajamas he was wearing the night before, when he had decided to kill himself. He wore a white t-shirt--no longer pristine, for when he threw himself to the ground it had met with dirt--and a pair of blue and white plaid cotton pajama pants; the outfit was something he would normally never be seen in outside of his house.

Gaara looked down at the man, still slightly drunk, though he had drank the last sip of his alcohol over approximately two hours before the sun began to rise. The first thing he noticed about Neji was that the entirety of his eyes were white, it was confusing. For a brief moment he wondered if the man before him was blind, but changed his mind when he saw Neji whipping his head from side to side, trying to decide where he was, Gaara presumed.

"Naruto sent you with me. He's entrusted me to look after you until he gets off work." Gaara stated, not an ounce of emotion in his voice as he spoke.

Neji looked up and down at him, before turning to his side to get up, he found that he couldn't however, as his vision started fading in and out and a wave of nausea took him over. The farthest he had managed to get was onto his hands and knees before the vomiting set in.

Gaara watched the scene intently, making sure that Neji wasn't throwing up blood, and that nothing too detrimental was happening to the man. Vomit had always managed to disgust Gaara, as he imagined that it did everyone, and he felt the man on his knees before him should feel particularly lucky that he was paying so much attention to him that he was willing to watch him puke to make sure he was okay. He kept reminding himself throughout Neji's sickness that he owed this to Naruto.

Upon finishing, Neji wiped his mouth with the backside of his hand, spitting what remained in his mouth to the ground quickly.

"When--" He paused, feeling another wave of nausea come over him, using one of his arms he held his stomach, and with the other he held himself up. Eventually he gave up on holding himself up with one hand and rocked his body back to just sit on his knees. Coughing, he continued talking:

"When does Naruto get off of work?" He asked, holding his stomach the entire time.

Glancing at his watch, Gaara met eyes with Neji, "One hour and forty-seven minutes." Gaara immediately turned his attention back to the rising sun.

"God, the sunrise is enough to kill me," Neji admitted, as he closed his eyes tightly and turned his face away from the sun. Gaara looked back at the man when he spoke, tilting his head slightly, he wondered if it was sensitivity to light due to a headache or if it was his unusual eyes causing the sensitivity.

"Is it your eyes?" Gaara asked, finding himself minutely curious about the other's eyes. He had never seen entirely white eyes before.

Neji moaned and turned his face back in Gaara's direction, eyes squinting as Neji looked at him.

"Are my eyes the reason I'm sensitive to the light?" He questioned the other, deciding that was the most likely reason for the question. With a nod from Gaara, Neji continued.

"No, it's just my head. It's killing me," Neji stated, moving one of his hands from his stomach to his head. Frowning, he suddenly wished that he actually had the balls to take the entire bottle of pills at once, instead of one by one; that way there would be no turning back. Sighing, he thought back to his other failed attempts, noting that he felt the same level of misery each morning after.

Gaara nodded again and raised himself from the seat, brushing down his clothes as he went.

"Come on," As he spoke the words he turned away from neji and began walking down the small concrete path toward the road.

Tilting his head Neji questioned him silently, before standing up.

"Where are you going?" No way was Neji agreeing to follow him without first knowing where the two would be headed.

"I can get you pills to stop the vomiting and the headache," Gaara never quit walking, as if he knew Neji would follow him.

Slightly hesitant, Neji did just that, as he decided he wanted the nausea and headache _gone._


End file.
